Well, I guess I learned a few things last week. First, Minnesota is NOTHING without AP. Which means they will be nothing this season. Second, you can never count The Eagles out, no matter how awful they play. And third, Roger Goodell is a joke and the owners are still going to keep him!

But the JOKE topic is for another time. We’re here to talk football and make our three picks for week three. Not a problem. First, we have to check the injury report. Hmmm, a few more players have been placed on the IR while several more will be on the sidelines for a few weeks to come. Standard procedure, now that there’s no more contact in practice (Hey Pete, I thought that was supposed to make the game safer)!

Then we need to see which players have been arrested or suspended this week. Holy $%#&! Seriously? But he seemed like such a nice guy. And those guys didn’t look like cheaters to me! Oh well, Pete’s been a fair guy about these actions over the years. I’m sure he’ll do the right thing!

Wait a minute. I thought this was about football. It is about football? Then why does the conversation keep going back to the complete and utter failure of Uncle Goody? What’s that? The owners have asked me to lower my voice?

Yeah, that’s gonna happen!!

On to the picks for the week.

This week’s Lock of the Week (1-1).

If there was ever going to be a true lock this year, it’s this week in Foxboro. Not only are the Patriots looking like a real team again, but the pathetic Oakland Geriatrics…er…Raiders are coming to town.

I know I had envisioned New England getting upset by the Vikings last week (and I sincerely apologize for that. My staff had nothing to do with it and I am currently looking into updating our policies to make sure that mistake never happens again. Please don’t fire me!) Hey somebody get Peter out of here.

Sorry about that folks. Where was I? Oh yeah.

The Raiders will be lucky to win a single game this year. In fact, they’ll be lucky if anyone from their starting lineup in game one is on the field in week 17. Most of them should have already retired.

This one won’t be close or pretty. Patriots win by at least 25 points, or they should hang their heads in shame!

This week’s Upset of the Week (1-1).

I wasn’t all that shocked by the fact that the experts have chosen this game to go the other way. However, I feel pretty confident in my upset choice this week. Ready?

The Arizona Cardinals will beat the San Francisco 49ers!

Call me a homer if you want, but there is logic behind that decision. Look, ten weeks from now, I expect both of these teams to be right in thick of the playoff race. Assuming there are no more major injuries or suspensions, they both figure to be a lot healthier than they are right now.

However, right now, they are both knee deep in both of those categories. I just think the 49ers are a little bit deeper. Let me explain.

The Cardinals had lost their monster linebacker and monster defensive lineman for the season. They now have lost their starting quarterback for a couple of weeks, an aging but still very good linebacker for the season and the goal line rusher forever.

Meanwhile, the 49ers are without their monster linebacker for nine weeks, a handful of other defensive players to injury, their All-Pro tight end to injury, although he may still play, and another guy that most people are arguing should not be playing.

Here are the differences. The 49ers had a complete collapse last week and lost their season opener in their new stadium to a team that they should have slaughtered. The week before, their offense was non-existent, leaving their defense to bail them out against a very bad Cowboys team. And with the off season soap opera with their head coach, they don’t look cohesive at all.

Arizona has not lived up to their potential either. They were supposed to be a scoring machine, with a defense that was only a shadow of last year’s top notch group. Yet somehow, some way, their defense is playing nearly as good as last year’s squad, while their offense is chugging along in second gear. Yet, they are winning the games they should be.

The difference in this game actually comes from the leadership. The veteran players are motivating the youngsters, the coaching staff is well respected by the players, and ownership has become one of the best in the league. This has become a team that believes they can beat any team, any time.

I’m looking for a very brutal, bloody game. And I’m looking for the Cardinals to win by a TD.

This week’s Game of the Week (1-1).

How can I possibly pick any other game for this category? When was the last time you saw a rematch of the previous Super Bowl? Especially in week three. And with both teams favorites to return to the next Super Bowl!

That’s right folks, the Denver Broncos are visiting the Seattle Seahawks for a rockem’ sockem’ robots game of football in the loudest stadium in the league!

It would be easy to say that the Seahawks will destroy the Broncos, given the pounding they dished out last February. And that was in a neutral location, where this game is at home.

Something tells me that Denver won’t be quite the pushover they were last time. They have been playing better than the Seahawks so far this season, and they are getting back one of their weapons this week in Wes Welker.

Then again, Seattle was embarrassed at San Diego last week, which very well could mean that the sleeping giant has awoken. If that is the case, Denver could be in for a long day.

I’m leaning more towards the second line of thought, although I don’t think it will be the blowout that it was in the Super Bowl. However, when the final gun sounds, I fully expect to see the Seattle Seahawks beat the Denver Broncos by double digits.

There you have it, as clear as a Roger Goodell Q & A session.

What did he actually say he was going to do? You couldn’t tell either, huh. Well one thing is for sure. He’s says he is very sorry. Now there’s one thing he said that I fully agree with. He is very sorry!