SPORTS HEADLINES THAT I REFUSE TO DISCUSS

11Jun13

I spend a good amount of my free time listening to various radio broadcasts.  Some are news and political shows and some are sports related.  Although they are interesting for the most part, there are times when I simply must turn the dial.

Why would I do something like that?  Because the host (or team of hosts, which seems to be the latest trend) insists on talking about stupid stories that have no business eating up time on the airwaves.

Personally, I refuse to take part in this ridiculous waste of time.  That’s why I turn the dial and that’s why I will not write about them.

What kind of stories am I talking about?  Let me give you a couple of examples.

CHAD “OCHOCINCO” JOHNSON – Here we have a guy that had a boatload of talent coming into the league.  Talk about potential!  This wide receiver was quick, big, strong and had great hands.  The problem was, his head was so big, he could barely fit through the locker room door.

You’ve all heard the expression “there’s no I in team”.  This is the type of guy that would respond with “yeah, but there is an M and an E”.  If he had one ounce of humility, he would have kept his mouth shut and been a Pro-Bowler for a decade or more, before retiring and eventually being elected into the Hall of Fame.

Instead, he chose to make Terrell Owens look like an unselfish, team player!

He was so full of himself, that he legally changed his name to his jersey number, demonstrating once and for all what the most important thing in his life really was – himself!!

To nobody’s surprise, he ended up bouncing from team to team, alienating himself from the league, one locker room at a time.

Last preseason, when he was covered in welts from where the other teams kept touching him with a ten foot pole, Miami offered him one final opportunity to prove that he really could become a team player.  How did he repay them?  He got arrested for “allegedly” assaulting his soon-to-be ex-wife.  The Dolphins immediately cut him loose.

As with most celebrities, the court system could not bring themselves to actually put him in jail, so they slapped his hand, gave him a year of probation and asked for his autograph.  (Okay, I made that “autograph” thing up, but I’ll bet I’m not too far off!)

Now he’s “back in the news”.  While facing the latest judge for not meeting with his probation officer in May, he showed the same disrespect for the court room that he has shown for everyone else in his life and profession, by slapping his lawyer on the hind quarters when he thought he had been let off the hook once again.

This time, the courtroom actually had a judge that thought celebrities deserved the same level of justice as the rest of us mere mortals.  After giving him a piece of her mind, she threw his sorry butt in jail where it belonged.

I’m happy that we finally found a judge with the intestinal fortitude to do her job, but I am sick to death of hearing about this clown every time he ups the ante in the game of stupidity.

And that’s why I refuse to discuss Ochocinco!

TIM TEBOW – Another “news” story that has no business even being discussed is the latest Tebow update.  This one is completely different from the “85” story.  You see, I actually like Tebow, as a person.  He seems to be a genuine, down to earth guy.

The problem is, he is a below average quarterback in a league that requires exceptional skills.

Now, I can understand all of the excitement during his rookie season.  After all, he had just finished a college career that included his team winning two national titles, so expectations were extremely high.  This is why he was chosen first by the pathetic Denver Broncos.  They needed a leader that could turn things around for them.

He rode the bench for the majority of his rookie season, not officially gaining the starting job until week six of his second season.  Although his stats were abysmal, he did manage to get the Broncos into the playoffs and actually won a game against the mighty Steelers.

The town of Denver proclaimed him the Messiah and propped him high atop the Rocky Mountains.  The fact that the Patriots utterly destroyed them the following week was soon forgotten.  Their savior was here!

Well, at least until Peyton Manning signed.

So on to New York Mr. Tebow went.  He was sure to succeed with the Jets, since all he had to beat out for the starting job was the worst starting quarterback in the league.

By the time the end of the season finally (and mercifully) arrived, Tebow had fallen so far down the depth charts that he couldn’t even get on the field when Mark Sanchez was benched!

The past off-season has been filled with speculation by all of the experts as to where he would end up.  Most had already discounted the NFL, but were throwing out ideas like Arena Football and the Canadian League.

There were even rumors that he was asked to coach a team from the lingerie league (and we were supposed to believe that?)

Now word has come out that the New England Patriots, of all teams, has actually signed Tebow to a two year deal.  Holy cow, is Tom Brady really gonna’ have to fight for his job this season?  Or will they use him as a receiver or a running back?  Maybe he’ll be on special teams!

Seriously? Are we really going to have that discussion?

The Patriots signed the man to a two-year deal with not a single penny guaranteed.  Zero, zilch, nada!  He was signed to be the third string quarterback on a team that saw the second string quarterback complete one of four passes thrown last year.  He won’t even need a helmet, just hand him a clipboard and a baseball cap and he’ll be set.

This is why this should not be a news story.  Want to help prove me right?

Real quick, who are the following guys?

Brad Smith, Mohamed Sanu, Josh Morgan, Harrell Graham and Armanti Edwards.

They are last year’s third string quarterbacks for the Bills, Bengals, Redskins, Packers and Panthers.  Where are the stories about them?  That’s right, there aren’t any.

And that’s why I refuse to discuss Tim Tebow!

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