The brackets are set, 68 teams are in and at least fifteen more are grumbling that they should have been in if only .……. well, you can fill in the blank with whatever you want.  I just want to get on with making my picks. 

There’s a couple of reasons for that.  First, if I only spent 30 seconds on each pick, it would still take more than a half hour, given that we’re now up to 67 games in total.  Granted, most brackets don’t even bother letting you pick a winner of the first four games, since they are only being played to determine the four open spots in the field of 64, so we’ll call it 31 minutes and 30 seconds. 

But then you have to sit and wonder, if there are four games to fill in four spots, why aren’t they for the four #16 spots?  In case you didn’t notice, only two of these games are being played to determine a #16 seed.  The other two games are to determine a #14 seed and a number #12 seed.  Can anyone explain this to me?  I mean, if you’re good enough to be considered a #12 seed (which would equate to a #46), why do you have to prove yourself to the rest of the field while two teams are sitting securely with a #16 seed locked up (which would equate to #61 or #63).  That just added another five minutes to the task! 

Then you have to add another eight minutes to your time to try to figure out just who some of these teams are.  I mean, no offense to this school.  I’m sure it’s a wonderful campus and a great learning environment, but can you tell me off the top of your head exactly where Belmont is?  I know, I know, I’ve heard of it, too.  But I couldn’t tell you what state it’s in or where in the state it is.  Hang on a second…I’ve gotta go check now or it’ll drive me crazy.  I’ll be right back …………………………..……………………… ………………………I found it!  It’s in Nashville, Tennessee.  And it has nothing to do with the Belmont Stakes, which is held in New York.  (See what I mean?  I knew where that was!)  There goes another seven minutes. 

Now I’ve got to remember all the upset sure things (huh?) that happen every even year that isn’t divisible by eight but is divisible by 503 (do the math).  Let’s see, usually there are two #9 winners in the first round, but this time there will be three, so we have to figure out which #9 will be the sole first round loser.  Okay, got it!  Then, of course, there is always a #12 that beats a #5, but this time it will be a #11 over a #6.  Okay, I’ve got that one.  And naturally, there’s no way all four #1 seeds will make it to the final four, so we’ve got to get rid of one or two of them.  Let’s make it two.  Better add another nine minutes. 

Oh no. Michigan State has made it to the final four each of the last three times they were a #1 seed.  Should I change my picks and put them in the final four?  And the #1 overall seed has not made it to the final game in eight of the last nine years.  Should I knock Kentucky off early?  Another six minutes to deliberate, pace, talk to myself, sit back down and change nothing! 

Okay, enough already!  I’ve made my picks and I’m not changing them.  Rather than bore you with the first two (actually three) rounds, let’s begin at the sweet sixteen. 

In the South, I’ve got Kentucky beating Wichita State, Baylor beating Duke, then Kentucky over Baylor. 

In the West, I picked Michigan State over Louisville, Missouri over Murray State, and Missouri beating Michigan State.

In the East, I went with Syracuse over Wisconsin, Ohio State over Cincinnati, with Syracuse beating Ohio State. 

In the Midwest, I’ve chosen North Carolina over Michigan, Kansas over North Carolina State, then Kansas over North Carolina. 

In the final four, I picked the two remaining #1 seeds, Kentucky and Syracuse, to make it to the final game, with Syracuse beating Kentucky 79-76 to bring it home. 

There you go, my sure fire picks.  No doubt about them.  Guaranteed!  And it only took 66 minutes and 30 seconds!

Just don’t ask me again tomorrow, because they’ll all change by then!!!